Follower

So I have decided to write a blog.

I should probably preface this with the fact that I am not writing because I am witty or creative with my words, like my s-i-ls, but really because Greg doesn't care to listen to my random thoughts. He tries to multitask when I want to talk to him about something while he is watching TV, but ultimately he doesn't listen to a word I say. Because of his inability to listen to me while I ramble on about something stupid that is on my mind, I have created a blog to let those thoughts out. Some of which might be insightful, but probably about 95% of the time they will just be random, deep thoughts.

Honestly, I don't really care of anyone reads this. Mainly because I am not really good at writing. I am terrible at spelling. It was always embarrassing as a teacher to spell a word incorrectly on the board. I tried so hard to appear smart to those kids, or at least smarter than them. Secondly, I don't like people to critique my writing ability. English was always my most nerve racking subject. I hated it when we had peer to peer edits. I would always try to partner up with the dumbest girl in the class so that I would feel smarter. Now, you might be thinking, why write a blog when I don't like people to read what I write? Well, my answer to that is that I am not being graded for this, so that makes me less nervous about people reading it. Then again, I go back to my original purpose of the blog: to express my thoughts because Greg won't listen to me. It is easier for me to write them down then try to get him to care about what I am talking about, when it comes to my random conversations.

I tend to have my most deep thought right after work while driving to pick up Garrett from daycare. My only conclusion is that is the first time of the day where I can have my own thoughts that don't relate to work. Work is very consuming while at work. I have little time to do anything else, which is a good thing to some extent. I like staying busy, but I also liked working causally. I miss being able to call my mom and talking to her for like 30 minutes while at work to catch up on Young and the Restless. These days I barely have time to text her. I have to catch up on Young after work and those get interrupted by a screaming 17 month old who wants my attention. I really don't have room to complain about work, yet. I only have 20 claims and the average for all the other adjusters is 170. I don' t even know what it is like to be busy, so needless to say, I have no room to complain about not having time to think.

It is so hard to talk to Greg sometimes about things because we are basically the complete opposite. That is a good thing in some areas, but while reflecting today about our one year anniversary coming up, I started to think about how people say that the first year of marriage is the worst year of marriage for most couples. We will be celebrating our first anniversary on June 5th. That is a Saturday, so we can actually do something nice for the big day. I tried to have a conversation with Greg about this, but as you could predict, I choose the worst time to talk to him about it: while he was watching a movie. For some reason I have not learned to not ask him an important (to me) question while he is watching TV. All he said was I don't know. That drove me up the wall. My mind was screaming: YOU HAVEN'T THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT TO DO FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY??? DOESN'T IT MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU?? This is kind of a perfect example of our relationship. I like to plan things out way in advance and Greg never worries about it. Its not that he didn't care, it just wasn't on his radar yet. It was way too far out into the future, a little over a month. For me, I secretly wanted him to plan this wonderful weekend getaway for the two of us and then surprising me with it. But Greg has learned to not plan things without consulting with me first. Example: I wanted to go out to dinner, some place nice, and he chose to go to Jalapenos. Now I love Jalapenos, but I wanted something new and different. He thought he was doing a good thing by taking me somewhere that I once mentioned that I wanted. I said while driving down 69 South "We aren't going to Jalapenos, are we?" We didn't go to Jalapenos. We went to Barleys instead because we couldn't decide on a place to go. Neither one of us got our way. Greg can't seem to read my mind, so he just results to waiting for me to tell him exactly what I want.

We have had our little squabbles, but if this is the worst that our marriage will bring, then I have to say that I am really looking forward to the next 50 years because it can only get better. We have been so blessed in our first year of marriage and really during our whole relationship. Even though we started out untradationally, God has really shown that he will take care of us especially in times of trial. Our first year of dating was not easy, so that is probably what should be our "first year of marriage." I know we weren't technically married, but we had to grow together like a married couple would because we were expecting a child. I have no regrets as to how things have happened in my life because ultimately they have all been lessons that needed to be learned.

Hopefully, Greg and I will be blessed with many more year of marriage. It will not be easy. Every day brings a new challenge. Mostly Greg trying to figure out my ever changing moods. I really do feel grateful that he has stuck by my side this whole time. I always thought that if he still wanted to marry me after me being pregnant, then there is nothing that he can't handle.